Tag Archives: free range

Life On A Leash

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Sam’s best friend and confidant, Mason, is moving.Mason His human owners bought a condo and in just a few days they’ll leave their little apartment here at the farm and head to the city.

Because Sam’s been around the block a few times, he knows what that means for poor old Mason- life on a leash. Mason and Sam are free range dogs. They run and play in the large backyard full of kids, toys and sticks to chew on.

Life’s been free and easy for these two best dog friends. But life as Mason knows it, is about to change. No more wild and free, no more bark till you drop.  Mason and SAm playing

So, in an effort to help Mason adjust, Sam has some suggestions for him…..

Strive for cuteness when you go for a walk

Humans like cuteness,especially in dogs. Perk up your ears and trot happily-humans will stop to pet you and tell your owner how absolutely darling you are. This could come in handy later, especially if you’ve been bad-like accidentally barking at a cat or eating some flowers. Hopefully, the humans at the condo will remember how cute you were and will overlook your offense.

Heel, heel…just heel

Sam says if Mason remembers nothing else, remember what the word “heel” means. Humans like dogs that heel. Sam thinks that humans are control freaks. Human owners tend to say “heel” a lot, probably because they need to know they’re in charge. But Sam suggests that Mason just heel and let the humans get their control fix, it will make his life easier.

Stuff the barking

Humans don’t like barking dogs…they dislike dogs that bark so much they have coined a phrase about their feet-”oh, my barking dogs hurt, Elma.”(say this with a strong southern accent for effect) It’s quite humiliating to be compared to feet so Sam says stuff the barking. Instead choose a short little yap when someone knocks on the front door. Your human owners will be so proud of your guard dog skills. Humans really are easy to please.

Poop like you mean it

Pooping is treated in a very civilized manner in the city. City humans like to pretend that dogs don’t poop-they hide it with a quick clean up strategy. Tidy little green bags are made available on many street corners for your human owners to pick up your poop then throw it away. So, if you need to poop Sam says don’t worry, your human will get rid of it in a flash.

In his generosity, Sam decided to give Mason a going away gift- an 8 by 10 glossy print of himself.  Sam knows that his picture will cheer up poor old Mason when life on a leash gets too rough.

Sam heard politics is a dog eat dog...